What does it mean to live "the 'underconsumption' life"?

Do I do that? Nope.

Well, some of it is healthy. Once I got wealthy enough to afford anything I wanted? I realized I really didn’t want that stuff. I only wanted it in the first place because I couldn’t have it. Like a crying little boy who’s sister got a cookie but he didn’t. I was just crying about the injustice of life or trying to prove something to myself.

I live according to the dictates of my conscience. Help where I can. I am very aware that I’m not going to be here forever. I will leave it all behind. I’m not here to consume. To be a giant black hole that devours everything and returns nothing. I try to be reasonable. Helpful, kind, and decent.

Is there a possibility that we are living in a simulation and that there is a concept of rebirth?

Can I afford to live in a 6000 sq/ft house on the affluent side of town? Own four new high end cars? Take seven long vacations a year to exotic locations? I most certainly can afford that without batting an eye.

Some is unhealthy. I have been really poor in the past. At 20 and again at 31. I was homeless both times. Once for a month and the second time for over a year. I have a tremendous fear of that. So I stockpile. Tons of redundancy. It’s really neurotic. Not to the point of being a miser but I could loosen up a bit.

So I have a huge surplus of money every month. I am really grateful to God for that. I am also aware it’s not for my own selfish satisfaction or security. It’s not to pump my ego up or convince myself I’m better than anyone. I am simply blessed and awe struck.

Ive been pretending to be okay and acting as normal as possible, but Im actually completely heartbroken after a recent breakup. Its painful and really affecting me, to the point where I cant concentrate at work, Ive lost my appetite, I cant sleep, and It feels as if my whole world has been turned upside down. I loved him so much. He said so many cruel things to me and it made me realize he must not have loved me the way I loved him, or he wouldnt have said such horrible things. How do I handle the heartbreak and why cant I accept that he didnt love me and just forget about him?

I was also worried about what people think. Thinking showing off would improve my social status. It does but not with the people that matter.

Paranoia. Lot’s of predatory people out there.

I still enjoy the 70% of sales at JC Penney. Still use coupons online. Still cut my own grass. My neighbor calls me Forrest Gump.

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It means what I do. Here’s how it works.

Money only fixes certain financial problems. Creates others. Once my basic needs are met? Nice place to live, Good car. Decent food. Bills covered. Savings and investment covered. Taxes covered. Then what? What’s really important to me.

I live far far far far below my means. Why?

How can I get my ex-husband to love me again?